Cognitive Distortions: Mental Speed Bumps
In therapy, one topic I often talk with my anxious clients about are their most used cognitive distortions, or “thinking errors”, rooted in CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). These distortions are usually seen as unhelpful ways of thinking that cloud our reality and typically cause us more distress when thinking about a given situation. Discussing them in session allows client’s to work on catching them in real time in “real” life.
Recently, during a session with a client, we were discussing which cognitive distortions they most utilized. At one point the client paused and stated, “I know myself, and I know that even if I can catch myself using one of these distortions, it wouldn’t change the fact that I will still be using it and not knowing how to stop”. This was a good point. As a certified ~anxious girly~ myself, I know how hard it can be to know what to do vs. actually be able to do it. In that moment, I realized I hadn’t explained properly the why catching these distortions is so important.
I validated that catching cognitive distortions in our thought patterns is not going to necessarily stop these thoughts or magically make us feel less anxious. What it will do though is help our thoughts s l o w d o w n so that we don’t feel so out of control.
Think of identifying the cognitive distortions as a mental speed bump.
When our thoughts are going 100mph down a sketchy dirt road, slowing down to identify if we could be engaging in a distorted way of thinking forces us to pause and explore the potential that there could be other options. It allows us to view our predicament as less of a threat. Gives us time to take a breath and move forward with more control of the theoretical vehicle.
Below is a list of some common cognitive distortions. I would encourage you to read through them, pick out the few that you believe you most engage with, and commit them to memory. The next time your thoughts feel like they are going 100mph down a dirt road, take a brief pause to ask yourself if you are engaging in one of these distorted ways of thinking. Hit that speed bump and see if you can think of a more neutral (or just different) way of perceiving the situation.
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Filtering : Filtering out all the good things happening only to focus in and dwell on the bad
Polarizing Thinking/Black and White Thinking : All or nothing thinking—no room left for nuance.
Overgeneralizing : Taking one instance and figuring it will be the same for all instances. You forget your a line in a school play and now you think you will always forget all of your lines in all future performances.
Jumping to Conclusions : Believing something to be true with no evidence to prove it. Thinking someone hates him or her without any proof.
Catastrophizing/ Magnifying or Minimizing : Catastrophizing/magnifying—is when someone makes a small mistake but believes now that their whole world is crumbling down—they are late to a meeting and now they will most likely be fired and will lose their house and… Minimizing—Disregard any positive aspects of oneself such as accomplishments or characteristics that make you awesome
Personalization : This is the belief that the individual has a bigger role in the events around them going poorly than they actually do. They may think that since they were late to a meeting that they caused the meeting to fail.
Control Fallacies : The assumption that either everything that happens to you is due to other’s actions or your actions have caused others mistakes or failures. “My work is terrible because my coworker won’t stop interrupting me” or “my coworker got fired because I wouldn’t help them out when I could have”.
Fallacy of Fairness : The assumption that life should always be “fair”. Life is not always fair and for those who are looking for all situations to be fair, will find themselves angry and frustrated.
Blaming : Blaming others when things go wrong in your life, causing you to act or feel a certain way. No one can cause you to feel or act in a certain way.
“Shoulds” : “Stop Should-ing all over yourself”. “Shoulds” are implicit or explicit “rules” we have for our self and others. When someone breaks our rules, we feel angry. When we break our own rules, we feel guilty.
Emotional Reasoning : The act of believing that your thoughts on something are truths. Emotions are not indicative of truth. AKA “I believe I am unattractive in this moment, so that must be true.”
Fallacy of Change : Expecting others to change for us. Expecting that people should change the way they are because we think that they should change. “My happiness depends on you”, instead of being in control of your own emotional state.
Global Labeling/ Mislabeling : An extreme form of generalization. If one fails in one particular situation, then one determines that they are a failure in ALL aspects of life. Can also be used for “others”… someone was a bit rude in a given situation, so someone generalizes that the individual is a mean person. Or someone is a bad mother, or that she abandoned her children, if she went out for an evening.
Always Being Right : The belief that being wrong is unacceptable. Being right is more important than the feelings of others.
Heavens Reward Fallacy : The belief that a sacrifice or self-denial will pay off immediately. Will result in feeling bitter about not receiving a reward.
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